tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24592426630576959272024-03-05T12:58:57.357+08:00Pushing FIVE ZERO~Good Things In Life~Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.comBlogger68125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-12456749554322532102014-02-17T15:54:00.000+08:002014-02-17T15:54:47.082+08:00Pushing 50: For One More Day<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<i><span style="font-size: large;">"But ask yourself this: have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time you thought they would be here forever?' ~Mitch Albom, For One More Day.</span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;">'I hope you never hear those words. Your mom. She died. They are different than other words. They belong to some strange, heavy, powerful language that pounds away at the side of your head, a wrecking ball coming at you again and again, until finally, the words crack a hole, large enough to fit inside your brain. And in doing so, they split you apart.' ~Mitch Albom, For One More Day.</span></i><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">If i were to read this book 20 years ago, it might have been just another good book. Interesting but still just another good book.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">However, reading it at 47, as a daughter to my late mum, a mother to my kids and a grandmother to my grandchildren, this heartrending book leaves me pensively mournful.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">And i miss my mom, more than ever...</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Rest in peace mummy.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>I love you.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Al-Fatihah.</i></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-65296851111732482292013-05-02T20:47:00.002+08:002013-12-27T22:17:09.448+08:00Pushing 50: Mixed Feelings<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Grey Areas</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">Aaahh...those tiny little fine lines. Those fine lines that act as signposts that say, "Okay, here's a tricky one. Now THINK!" And yours truly is someone who worships 'the ground those fine lines lie upon.' I contemplate and evaluate. And </span><span style="line-height: 18px;">consider</span><span style="line-height: 115%;"> and reconsider. Ponder. Plan. Assess. You name it. Yup that's me! </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">But...</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">when i woke up this morning, i realized that somewhere along the past 30 days *<i>or more</i>*, somewhere between awake and sleep, i have unintentionally AND unconsciously like Oscar Levant said, "erased those fucking fine lines!"</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">How and why it happened is just beyond me. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">One thing clear is that i just can't tell which is which anymore. My judgment are all wrong. The word 'WISE' had completely vanished from <b><i><u>my</u></i></b> dictionary and the grey areas have now become... </span><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Fifty Shades of Grey.</i></b> </span><span style="font-size: large;">*<i>yeah, </i></span><span style="font-size: large;"><i>I like that! Ahaks</i>*</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">And you guessed it! ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE!</span></div>
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MIXED FEELINGS</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">hellion me,</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>SueSenahAnderson</i></span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-34304511369795528532013-04-08T03:53:00.000+08:002013-04-08T03:53:45.061+08:00Pushing 50: Because She Chooses to See the World in Bright Bold Colors<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>The soul becomes dyed with the colors of its thoughts.</i></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Love always,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>SueSenahAnderson</i></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-22158206534391414162013-03-30T03:39:00.002+08:002013-03-30T13:17:55.928+08:00Pushing 50: Our dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>~Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un~</i></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fcfcff; color: #141414; line-height: 20px;"><i><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i></span>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">How do i start this one?</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">My sister called to inform that he was admitted to ICU the day before. "How is he?" I asked. "Pretty bad this time. He was coughing blood the last time I checked." She said but did not persuade me to come home and visit the old man. She, like everyone else in the family has stopped doing that a long time ago. Attempt in making me to come home if there is any, is guaranteed to be undesirably fruitless. The next day she called again and told me that he has left us. "Are you coming home?" I was surprised she even asked. </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">How do i do this? What do i write about someone that I hardly knew?</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">I tried to remember moments with him...moments we both spent together. Did he ever hold my hands when i was growing up? Did he pick me up when i fell? Did he say comforting words when i was down? Was he there to guide me when i lost my way? Was he ever proud of me?</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">I couldn't even remember the last time I saw him. </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">We were never close. He left when i was 10. Even when we were living under the same roof he was hardly ever at home. And whenever he was home, our paths rarely crossed. I never really knew him and neither did he know me. We were total strangers, only sharing the same blood</span><span style="font-size: x-large;">. A</span><span style="font-size: large;">nd i guess inevitably the blood connection made me, whether or not i want to admit it, love him and deep in my heart i know he loved me too. It's just that we both had our funny ways of showing it. </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">May you rest in eternal peace dad. I do believe you loved me. </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;">Al-Fatihah.</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-size: large;">"Oh Allah, forgive my father. Make him among the guided ones, raise his status and be his deputy among the grieving. O Lord of the two worlds, forgive us and him and make his grave wide and full of light" Aameen Ya Rabb, Aameen.</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dyZH9UJkUob5uPPzPe3qNrUnyncss9beE1J5vxwRrm0twySzMfku7r_czS7G2JRupLgDTIzmhzef3sBw_r9oQ' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
Senja memanggil pulang Sang Pengembara</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Menangis ia</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Melihat keperihan zaman pencarian </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Katanya aku sendiri</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Perjuangan dulu hanyalah ujian</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Hanyalah bayangan</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Untuk menghadapi perang yang utama</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Hanyalah diriku sendiri</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Dan hidayah</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Selama ini</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Hanyalah Engkau yang kudambakan</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Dan semoga sejahteralah</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Engkau padaku oh hidayah</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Dan tanpamu apalah aku</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Apalah aku tanpa hidayah</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Video oleh cleibet@YobTualangSekah</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
AL-Fatihah</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Rohani Binti Abdullah 19 April 1937 - 30 August 2005</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Edie Ramlan Bin Ramli 20 April 1965 - 6 November 2009</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Abdul Rahman Bin Ismail 4 May 1934 - 12 March 2013</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-84521573124159955972013-03-10T00:57:00.002+08:002013-03-10T01:03:39.039+08:00Pushing 50: Small Changes Can Make Big Difference<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Despite the fact that it was lunch break the place was
relatively deserted. The weather was scorching and even the thick dark canvas shades
of the café’s smoking section couldn't keep off the heat from making my skin
sizzled. I just needed a tall glass of iced Nescafe and a long drag of nicotine
to take me away from this insane humidity and l would then be safe and sound in
my own small, sweet shell. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Why is it that the amount of money you have in your bank
accounts or in your expensive leather wallets determines the weight of your
opinion?” I had not forgotten that he
was with me and that we were waiting for our Aloo Mutters with white rice to be
served. The weather however had taken the best of me and the drop-dead-gorgeous
creature who was sitting in front of me appeared more like a fata morgana that
I chose to ignore for the time being. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"> “Huh?” That was the
only available response escaped my mouth. The day was disgustingly hot and <i>so
was he</i>. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Why is it that you first need to be rich and then would
only your opinion matter?” He
paraphrased his question. His deep set eyes drilled holes into mine. Wait, let
me rephrase that sentence. His brilliantly beautiful, deep set, brown eyes were
transfixed onto mine and bored deep holes right down into my retinas. For a
split second I lost my balance. He was god-damnly good-looking and sinfully hot
... BUT young. Too bad. *<i>Yeah, leave it alone senah…he’s just a kid for crying out loud!</i>*</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And… your point being?” I said, much too nonchalantly. The
fact that a young, good-looking guy WITH a good thinking cap doesn't always
come in the same package and in my case, it definitely doesn't happen every day
therefore I should and ought to at least, show a bit of interest and concern on
the topic. But the weather…the heat was distracting me. Or was it HIM? *<i>Naah,
forget it…too young!</i>*</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“We are becoming slaves to money. We work hard for money and
then we work harder for more money. Why do we become so money oriented? Our
basic needs are simple and yet we have created a complex life. We want a better
house to live in, expensive clothes to wear and rich in flavour, rich in
quality, rich in looks kind of food to eat. And we need more money because we need
to have more of those better things in life. And then we complain that we don’t
have the time for anything else except work. And we are so dead focused on this
‘Quest for Money’ that we fail to appreciate the wonderful things in life. We
fail to see the sufferings of others. We have created a self-centred society. We
don’t give a crap about others. We don’t care about poachers hunting down elephants
in Africa or the Japanese killing whales. We just care about our own pathetic
selves. ” His hands moved about while he was talking; he touched the menu, moved
the ketchup bottle, wiped imaginary dust off the tissue dispenser, flipped my
cigarette box, rearrange his thick unruly hair and stopped only when his
sentence reached an end.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGQk2ul0ZQgYax4if5UtpKjWbLa0swKkyJBxt9XDbAMzbN8iBwvEmgtPXtP9gao3NWsG12-n_fQm9zEuHXpL5XEqzaxFFmWTTqdNvYmAZgU9K_HGAUTrGhaPJ-_02-DAzPqzkH2Iwcm82X/s1600/money.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGQk2ul0ZQgYax4if5UtpKjWbLa0swKkyJBxt9XDbAMzbN8iBwvEmgtPXtP9gao3NWsG12-n_fQm9zEuHXpL5XEqzaxFFmWTTqdNvYmAZgU9K_HGAUTrGhaPJ-_02-DAzPqzkH2Iwcm82X/s1600/money.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">“True, it’s greed.” I know where he was coming from but honestly,
I wasn’t interested. I was tired and hungry and sweating like a horse. The last
thing on my mind was to indulge in a ‘let’s-save-the-world’ conversation. And
as good looking as he was, I preferred him not talking. <i>Not now. Please.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“When was the last time you smiled to a stranger?” He asked
as he pulled a cigarette from my freshly opened pack. I watched him placed it at
the right side of his mouth between his oh-so-kissable lips and lit it with my
RM1.20 green lighter. Did he just jump from one topic to another unrelated
topic or was it me who wasn’t paying attention here?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“I smiled at Goo-Goo before leaving the house this morning
but the dog didn't smile back. Obviously he was busy thinking of ways to make
more money…or dog-biscuits” He got my drift and smiled, a crooked smile, the
kind that reminded me of Bruce Willis and Pit Bull…and Mr. Misery, of course
not necessarily in that particular order nor for any particularly specific reason.
“And yeah…I also smiled and wished good morning to a guy on my way to the
office but he gave me that ‘You-Crazy- Woman’ look! End of story.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“That’s exactly my point. We have forgotten the fundamental
rules of living. Be kind to others. Love. Smile. Patience. Peace. Helping others.
We’ve known so much of Mother Theresa’s work, Ghandi and his philosophies. Islam,
Hinduism, Christianity, Buddhism… We know all the great teachings any preachers
had ever preached, but we just don’t practice most of the things we already know.”</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“True again.” I said as I wiped off trickles of sweat that
ran down the sides of my forehead. Given a good day I would have enjoyed this
topic. It’s about being humane and humanity and humility. I have an unspeakably
soft spot for these matters and could have easily dominated the conversation
and turned the table around. But kiddo, you caught me on a bad day, literally, so to speak. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">“Why don’t we?” He was determined to make my day a miserable
living hell.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Sometimes we forget, it just slipped off our minds.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Not good enough of an excuse”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“I’m saying it as it is, kiddo.” <i>Oh! Can you please STFU?!</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">He didn’t stop talking when our Aloo Mutters were served. I
hate talking while eating and so I let him did the talking most of the time. He
went on about capitalism and China, wars in Palestine, Syria and Rohingya. He
ranted about hunger in Africa, about media dictating the lives of youths around
the world… <i>yadayadayada</i>. I just ate, listened, nodded and chipped in when and
if necessary. I must admit that it was the best ‘conversation’ I ever had for a
long time but bugger… the heat! It was killing me!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“We should make the world a better place, you know? There
should be less hatred, less war, less selfishness. And, we should be more
considerate towards others and love one another more.” He continued. Our empty
plates were not collected so we used them as ash-trays. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Utopia you mean?” I suspected that he had been smoking some
shit and was being delusional.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Yeah, exactly!” he grinned, beaming a 1000 watt smile and
my heart stopped for a second.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“C’mon, get real!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Why not?” He wasn’t going to let me off the hook easily.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Utopia exists only in your head, silly!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“So, you mean we should just leave the world as it is now…
all fucked-up? Is that what you are trying to say?” he asked, looking at me
wide-eyed. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Yeah.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“I don’t believe you. You’re more intelligent than that,
that much I can tell”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“It’s not about being intelligent or less intelligent. It’s
about accepting things you can’t change. I was more or less like you a long,
long time ago. I was unhappy with the world. The unjust, cruelty, abuse, rape,
hunger, slavery, the war… all those things upset me big time back then. And I
became a rebel. Another character, with or without a cause, the world doesn’t
actually need. ”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And you’re not upset anymore now?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“I still am but I refuse to let those stuffs bug me. At this age, I’m done trying to save the world. I’m taking it easy and
going down with the flow…and smell the roses… and the coffee.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">“So you’re not doing anything to un-fuck the world?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“That and also I will try not to fuck it up real bad. I mean, I can't do much about the ozone layer part." I cued to my phone and laptop."Look, kiddo, I
know these things put questions into your head but as fucked-up as the world may be, it
still has countless wonderful things to offer. Why do you get all hung-up on the
bad things? Why not start being
grateful for… for example…the cloudless blue sky.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And the polluted but free air.” He said with a smirk.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And the beautiful trees”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And good Aloo Mutters” he said pointing to our plates a.k.a ash-trays.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And my children and grandchildren.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And my mother. Mothers are wonderful creatures you know?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Yes, I'm a mother, I know and we definitely are superhuman!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And my girlfriend, she’s wonderful too…”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And coffee…I’m grateful for Nescafe.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“And champagne.” he added with an evil grin.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“There you go…and why on earth did you get all worked up on
things you can’t change when you have plenty to be grateful for, is absolutely
just beyond me!”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Just curious, I guess. I just wanted to know how you
think.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Cat died now?”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Yup. Died. Buried.” He answered with a smile that could have easily stopped any woman in her tracks. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">The thing is, as I’m writing this down and the conversation
had taken place four days ago, and yet his question floats like ghost in my
mind. “So you’re not doing anything to un-fuck the world?” </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Just how exactly do we un-fuck the world? Do we reduce, recycle,
reuse enough? Do we car-pool? Have we done enough to stop global warming? Do we
need to intrude the animals’ natural abodes in the forest just for the sake of
development? Did we take part in Earth Hour? Do we know the names of our neighbors? Have we hugged our children enough times? Are we playing the roles of dedicated
children to our parents? Are we being kind to our siblings? Did we thank that
person enough for being there for us? Have we apologized for hurting someone? When
was the last time we told someone that we love them? Do we ever really give a
damn? Just how on earth do we un-fuck
the world when sadly enough we couldn’t even think of ways to un-fuck
ourselves? </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">taking baby steps,</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>SueSenahAnderson</i>.</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-22482258600062211292013-02-21T22:51:00.002+08:002013-02-23T11:20:30.320+08:00Pushing 50: You Can't Always Get What You Want (2)<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><u>Wounded Souls.</u></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"I told her what I needed her to know." </span><i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">He cut in between my "Hello."</span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Oh?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Yeah..." <i>He dragged the one syllable word longer than necessary and it sounded painful.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Which part?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"That I've lost feelings for her." <i>Shit, I was afraid of <b>that</b>!</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"And...?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"And...i feel relieved."<i> Somehow I have a gut feeling that his sentence <b>did not</b> end just there.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Relieved is...<b><i>GOOD</i></b>." </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"But..." <i>There, told ya!</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"But?! <b><u>But</u></b> is NOT good, man! Never."<i> However, an 'and' would be good, i wanted to add but did not.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"But somehow I think I'm being unfair to her. I'm being selfish. How could have i said that to her? That was mean. <b>I </b>was mean. She must have felt awful. What kind of a person am I? I'm screwed up big time, man!"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I bit my tongue. He needed to talk and my opinion could wait. Perhaps, not needed at all.</span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Never in my entire life had i ever imagined saying anything like that to her. <i>(A short pause)</i> Any sane person wouldn't do that to a woman he had spent
15 years of his life with. What is happening to me? Have i gone mad?!”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<i style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">I took that as a rhetoric
question despite the fact that I already had a few answers popping up like
fresh toasts in my mind. So i bit my tongue harder and let him talk.</span></i><br />
<i style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“How could this happen?” he continued. “How was it even
possible that you woke up one morning and you looked at your wife, you saw her
familiar face, her beautiful eyes, her warm smile… but you felt empty inside? You
touched her, but when your fingers brushed her skin, the skin only you knew so
well, and you felt... nothing but hollow... and COLD. How could that happen? How could the feelings just disappear like that... as if they had never been there before?” <i>He uttered his words slowly, taking his time; each new word carried more agony than the last.</i> <i>It was difficult not to miss the accentuated</i> <i>despair during</i> <i>the brief intermissions within his sentences, during the labored intake of fresh air into his lungs. I struggled to remain unruffled.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Day by day i pretended as though nothing had changed. I tried to convince myself that it was all just a phase, you know what I mean? I told myself this madness would soon leave and things would get back to being normal again. But the pretending, the acting... man, it was choking on me. I couldn't breathe.You know what I mean?" </span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Another pause. I could feel his pain cut through the silence like a newly bought butcher knife that chopped my soul into pieces. I quickly swallowed the lump in my throat before it turned into a sob.</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"I tried but it wasn't easy. It wasn't easy for me neither was it for her. It was choking on me. I couldn't</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> breathe. </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I had to tell her. I just had to! I.couldn't.live.a.lie.any.much.longer.”</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>( I lit up a ciggy. Inhaled,
paused. And exhaled. And I knew he was smoking too. I heard him exhaled. Or was
he snuffling? Was he crying? Shit! I
struggled for something to say. Something wise or funny but...Mr. Brain had gone out for lunch, at the most inappropriate moments obviously! Shit! )</i></span><span style="color: red;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“ Aren't you going to say anything?” <i>Finally he asked and i didn't miss the sobs he tried to hide at the end of his sentence.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Do you want me to lie or tell the truth?” <i>I asked back. I didn't need an answer. I just needed time to
arrange my thoughts.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Your lies suck.” </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“You’re an idiot” <i>I said but not in a condescending way. </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Tell me something I don’t know” he mumbled. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“How’s she doing?” <i>A stupid
question, yeah… I know!</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Not good.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“How are YOU doing?” <i>Another
stupid question.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Terrible”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Listen, you already told her what you needed her to know. If
it’s of any consolation, I think you did fine. Most couples, married or not
married, will come to this miserable stage at certain point of the relationship.
They do realize that somewhere between the familiar touch, the old jokes, the
routine ‘i-love-yous’, something has
gone missing, something is absent or something has died. But for so many
reasons, most of them inevitably decide to avoid the truth and carry on with
their daily lives…(sigh)… and succumb to… as <b><u>you</u></b> put it, pretense. Only a few, like you, will take the
bold step to come clean and tell the miserable truth. In a sense you're lucky you know? You have escaped
the banal <b><u>Alcatraz</u></b>.” <i>I wondered if anything I had said ever got through to
him. But when the pain is so intense what could ever possibly make any logical sense, anymore?</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Even if it means hurting the kids and your wife and let 15 years
of marriage go down the drain?”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“It’s either the truth or back to Alcatraz. Your call but
it’s never a win-win situation, kiddo. Everything has a price tag. No free
lunches, okay?” <i>I wished I could be a bit 'girly-like' and offered some sweet mushy comforting words. Or be slightly vulnerable and maybe even cry with him. Naahh... 'vulnerable' is for wimps!</i> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"If only there was another way of doing it and that no one would get hurt..." </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Oh, don't bullshit me! You <i><u>knew</u></i> there was another way of doing it. You could have stayed in that Alcatraz day in and day out. And not complaining. And not thinking. And not even feeling anything. That <i><u>was</u></i> the other way of doing it without having anyone getting hurt."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Except me."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"And round and round we go." I said, sarcasm intended. "Listen, you've said whatever it was that has been eating you all these while. Done. It's Damage Control time now. You need to pick up the pieces and start anew. </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Wallowing in self pity and remorse wont do the trick.</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> S</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">taying in your sadness and sulking won't help. It's time to move on."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The conversation ended shortly after that. Let's hope that the expensive call he made did justice to his weary soul. I on the other hand felt unsettled with something he said before he hung up.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"You and Tom have got it made. Lucky you, he's a great guy. Tell the old bugger i said 'Hi.' Ciao!"</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">And as if on cue, the great Tom appeared from the bedroom; wearing only boxer shorts with the famous 'I-napped-for-hours' hairdo, a puffy face and a grumpy mood to match.</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Was that Stan?" he asked without looking at me and disappeared into the kitchen. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Yup." I answered. "He said, 'Hi.'" </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Tom the Great reappeared from the kitchen with a glass of orange juice and stood facing me across the working-table.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"How is he?" He briefly glanced at me before his eyes were transfixed on something interesting through the window behind me. And as though satisfied with what he saw he then chug-a-lugged the liquid like a thirsty hippo.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Doing fine, I hope"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Tom the Great placed the empty glass on a neatly piled manuscript by the computer, wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and then turned around and made his way to the bedroom. I heard him said, "I'm late. My plane is less than 2 hours away. I got to shower. God knows how I hate these business trips!" He may or may not be addressing that statement to me. It's just Tom. Tom the Great, is...sigh...like that. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">He disappeared into the bedroom, and then i heard the bathroom door slammed and seconds later, opened.</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Tom the Great reappeared, naked this time, and walked towards the coffee table where his phone was resting like the queen of Sheba on her royal chaise. "Any call? Message?" I heard him mumbling. No,i didn't have to answer, it was not a question, to begin with. As he made his way back into the bedroom with his eyes fixed and index finger wiggling on the screen, i watched the meat on his bare, sagging, aged ass moved lazily upon each step he made until he disappeared again into the bedroom. I flinched!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I remembered the message well enough. The words were imprinted in my mind, just like the rest of the messages before that. And all the messages she had text him for the past couple of years. I flinched again.</span><br />
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<br />
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<span style="color: #4c1130; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i style="background-color: #ead1dc;">"Darling, I'm missing you already. Can't wait to get on the plane and snuggle up close to you. I love you... body, heart and soul. XOXO."</i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>Yes Tom, there was a message a for but oops! I've deleted it while you were sleeping, and probably while you were dreaming of her.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i style="text-align: start;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Lucky? No kiddo, I bloody chose to stay in this fucked-up Alcatraz</span></i><i style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large; text-align: start;">.</i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The End.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<b><span style="font-size: large;">Wounded souls... they totally kill me. </span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></b>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Yours truly,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>SueSenahAnderson.</i></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></b>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">P.S</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">You can't always get what you want</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">but if you try sometimes</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">well you just might find</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">you get what you need.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">- The Rolling Stones</span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-64664783574173547102013-02-16T20:58:00.000+08:002013-02-16T21:17:41.063+08:00Pushing 50: You Can't Always Get What You Want<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">It's been a long while. Yeah, i know. <strike>but fret no more, now i'm back</strike>. And i know I've been lazy. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>ewwww</i>!*<i>what was THAT?!</i>*</span><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>*lemme think. just.let.me.THINK!!</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>*okay..let's do that again</i>*<i>this time do it like you actually mean it?!</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It's been a LONG while. Yeah, i know. And i know I've been super lazy. Plus, I was mad. Who bloody wouldn't? It was an easy job. Any Tom, Dick and Harry could do it. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>naaahhh...that didn't sound quite right!</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>fingers tapping</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>now let's start from the top</i>*<i>AGAIN!</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It's been a LONG while. Yeah, i know. And NO, i haven't been lazy. I was mad *</span><span style="font-size: large;"><i>Who bloody wouldn't?</i>*</span><span style="font-size: large;"> and I needed time to deflect. So i ran to House for refuge and drown my sorrow in his miserable, unhappy life. Either that or i would be reading Twitter's Timeline like a <i>bible</i>. And when that failed to distract me, i would get into Mr. Misery's head and tried to think the way he thinks. Day in and day out. But i was still mad. *<i>VERY</i>* And i was mad for a LONG while!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">The thing is, it was an easy job and the pay spelled with an initial big digit and ended with many fat zeroes across my cheque! And already i could think of many miseries that would come to an end when the fat cheque settled comfortably in my starved wallet. *</span><i><span style="font-size: large;">counting chickens before they hatch eh? oh, just SHUT UP!</span></i><span style="font-size: large;">*</span><span style="font-size: large;"> And so i spent countless, sleepless nights *</span><i><span style="font-size: large;">and countless cups of coffee too, but of course!</span></i><span style="font-size: large;">* getting things ready for the stint and after countless sleepless nights I finally</span><span style="font-size: large;"> submitted the whole lock stock and barrel to Mrs. Boss. She was happy. I was elated. YAYY! </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">And then shit happened. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>fingers tapping crazily</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>lalalalalalalalalaaa</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>i need coffee</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*...<i>and ciggy</i>*</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">If<i>...............</i> <strike>and </strike>.<i>...........</i> but <i>.........</i> <strike>because</strike>....</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>sigh</i>*<i>i bloody give up!</i>*</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Losing my marbles,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i>SueSenahAnderson</i></span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-81234538694139716472013-01-07T04:10:00.001+08:002013-02-16T21:18:12.020+08:00Pushing 50: If you can't go to sleep...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwmNgpmbejv_9ubChPRAV6IHip0ohoqZVqcaTiPNbGriCUms5dkFEw9p8Y25XRlyp8FtC36vj24P2hDa-y4mOrbqZRKrpi6wKvgzIbLGllwR-2-2L9iURDQGEyTQUBzqiX3D263Hhp1Waa/s1600/MissingU.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwmNgpmbejv_9ubChPRAV6IHip0ohoqZVqcaTiPNbGriCUms5dkFEw9p8Y25XRlyp8FtC36vj24P2hDa-y4mOrbqZRKrpi6wKvgzIbLGllwR-2-2L9iURDQGEyTQUBzqiX3D263Hhp1Waa/s1600/MissingU.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I'm up to my nose in paperwork and Mr. Acer went into coma several times today. The new cooler pad obviously didnt do a good enough job in bringing his temperature down. He simply couldn't take the work load and finally collapsed! Poor guy. Typical of Mrs Boss, she wants everthing PRONTO! Chop chop! <span style="font-size: large;">*<i>sigh</i>*</span> Told her to hold<span style="font-size: large;"> </span>her horses. Either that or get me a new lap-top. <span style="font-size: large;">T</span>hat did the trick.</span> <span style="font-size: large;">She left me well alone<span style="font-size: large;"> after that. Anyhow <span style="font-size: large;">I</span> managed to cough <span style="font-size: large;">up <span style="font-size: large;">a completed module <span style="font-size: large;">for her to read <span style="font-size: large;">during breakfast</span>. <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">And I bet my last Ringgit Malaysia </span>her text msg will be wait<span style="font-size: large;">ing for me when <span style="font-size: large;">I</span> <span style="font-size: large;">wake up tomorrow. *<i>later this morning</i>*<i>man...it's a<span style="font-size: large;">lmost 4</span></i><span style="font-size: large;"><i>!</i>*</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">I'm dead tired. <span style="font-size: large;">Guess <span style="font-size: large;">I</span> <span style="font-size: large;">can skip the part where <span style="font-size: large;">I <span style="font-size: large;">feel the need</span> to<span style="font-size: large;"> mention</span> that my <span style="font-size: large;">b</span>rain is dead too<span style="font-size: large;">. <span style="font-size: large;">I<span style="font-size: large;">.</span>NEED<span style="font-size: large;">.</span>SLEEP<span style="font-size: large;">.</span></span> <span style="font-size: large;">As exhausted as <span style="font-size: large;">I </span>am right now I doubt if I can fall asleep right away. <span style="font-size: large;">M</span>y nerv<span style="font-size: large;">ou</span>s system <span style="font-size: large;">is</span> sti<span style="font-size: large;">ll buzzing around <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">as if there are dozens of</span> overly</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span class="st"><i> </i>enthusiastic </span><span style="font-size: large;">*<i>and crazy</i>* </span>Formula<span style="font-size: large;">1 <span style="font-size: large;">drivers driving <span style="font-size: large;">ferociously </span>to win the world championship<span style="font-size: large;">! </span> </span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Tomorrow <span style="font-size: large;">will be another long fu<span style="font-size: large;">ll day<span style="font-size: large;">, will try to get some sleep<span style="font-size: large;"> now</span></span></span></span>. *<i>fake yawn</i>*</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Not-So<span style="font-size: large;">-Sleepy but <span style="font-size: large;">dog-tired me<span style="font-size: large;">,</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">SueSenahAnderson. </span></span></span></span></i></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><i>P.S</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><i>want you to know i'm a rainbow too. </i></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-73161899970858832122013-01-06T00:09:00.000+08:002013-02-16T21:07:25.296+08:00Pushing 50: Up, Up and Away!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: large;">Mrs. Boss called yesterday with good news, "Yes, the job is yours. You're booked from ___ to ____, AND from ___ to ____. <b>AND</b> i may have something coming in March so keep your options open. <i>AND</i> for these two stints you have to...blablablabla..." I did the tribal fire dance while she was yakking on the other end of the line. <u><b>Alhamdulillah</b></u>! Yes! YES! YESSS!!! *<i>Fist Pump</i>!*</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">So <span style="font-size: large;">t</span></span>oday Mrs. Boss h<span style="font-size: large;">e<span style="font-size: large;">aped me with work. Modules, manuals, reading materials, hand-outs, PP slides, activities <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>etc e</i><span style="font-size: large;"><i>t</i><span style="font-size: large;"><i>c etc</i>.</span></span></span> <span style="font-size: large;">T</span>he <span style="font-size: large;"><i>WORKS</i>! <span style="font-size: large;">Looks like <span style="font-size: large;">I</span>'ve <span style="font-size: large;">got a lot on my</span></span> plate <span style="font-size: large;">until mid February. Meaning less time to<span style="font-size: large;"> blog<span style="font-size: large;"> or tweet but</span></span> hey, <span style="font-size: large;">I</span>'m not complaining<span style="font-size: large;">, <i><b>at all</b></i><span style="font-size: large;">!</span> A workaholi<span style="font-size: large;">c <span style="font-size: large;">I</span> am not but <span style="font-size: large;">I</span> love <span style="font-size: large;">this</span> <span style="font-size: large;">job</span>. Yeah, the pay is pretty good but it isn't just about the money. <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">I</span>t's that <span style="font-size: large;">i</span>ndescribable satisfying, <span style="font-size: large;">almost-orgasmic *<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-size: large;">of course</span> i had to add that part in just to annoy you</i>*</span></span> feeling you get at the end of the day knowing you've given your very best<span style="font-size: large;"> and hopefully <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">your</span> effort </span>does make a differen<span style="font-size: large;">ce</span> <span style="font-size: large;">in</span> <span style="font-size: large;">someone's</span> life. </span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span></span></span></span> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I got to run. Work beckons<span style="font-size: large;">!</span> </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">S<span style="font-size: large;">parky Me,</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-size: large;">SueSenahAnderson </span></i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<i><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">P.S</span></span></i><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">Life is good.</span></span></i></span><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-58622697317574905572013-01-02T06:18:00.002+08:002013-01-02T06:18:42.636+08:00Pushing 50: C'est La Vie<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Yesterday was a good day. No drama. No conflict. No pain. Everything was nice and dandy. Okay fine, there was a minor hitch afterall. And it's called Dr. Gregory House. This guy is starting to grow on me like poison ivy only that he doesnt give me rash. However, the thoughts of him made me drool, go haywire and hot all over. *please don't eye-roll me* Seriously, I could hardly get through the day without watching him. A mere 15 minutes was all i needed *a quickie? hey! you naughty liltle devil you* i would then be fine... and high. This addiction is getting pretty absurd. I'm utterly obsessed, with this man, it just simply blew my mind! I think I'm in love. Pathetic. Yes, i KNOW. Let's hope it's just a passing thing. If I'm still talking about House in March, somebody please...PLEASE hit me on the head with a rolling-pin!</span></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">So, the first day of 2013 went by smoothly. Did i learn anything new? Anything I haven't already known, perhaps? Okay, i did learn a few new words: encephalitis, myoclonoc jerk, creatinine, porphyria, cardiomyopathy,<em> </em>carcinoid, cirrchosis<b>. </b>No thanks to House. Apart from those? Nah! Same old-same old.</span></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Well probably i did learn something. I learned that wound takes time to heal. It doesn't get better immediately but eventually it will and even the scar will fade over time. It's the memories we carry in our hearts that will always remind us of the pain we want </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">so much to forget. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">C'est La Vie</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">yours sincerely,</span><br />
<i><span style="font-size: large;">SueSenahAnderson.</span></i><br />
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<span class="st"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"> *Somewhere between Twitter, Juanes' A Dios La Pido, House, menthol ciggy and hot coffee, i remembered you.*</span></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
*The reason i am still keeping this clip is just beyond me*</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-28019884385922197312012-12-31T23:29:00.001+08:002012-12-31T23:34:25.121+08:00Pushing 50: Desire<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_1">Two hearts fading, like a flower</span>
<span class="line line-s" id="line_2"> </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_2">And all this waiting for the power</span>
<span class="line line-s" id="line_3"> </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_3">For some answer to this fire</span>
<span class="line line-s" id="line_4"> </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_4">Sinking slowly, water's higher</span>
<br /><span class="line line-s" id="line_5">Desire, desire</span>
<br /><span class="line line-s" id="line_6">With no secrets, no obsession</span>
<span class="line line-s" id="line_7"> </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_7">This time I am speeding with no direction</span> </span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_8">Without a reason, what is this fire?</span> </span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_9">Burning slowly, my one and only</span>
<br /><span class="line line-s hover" id="line_10">Desire, desire</span>
<span class="line line-s hover" id="line_11">Desire, desire</span>
<br /><span class="line line-s hover" id="line_12">You know me, you know my way</span>
<span class="line line-s hover" id="line_13"> </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s hover" id="line_13">You just can't show me, but God I'm praying</span>
<span class="line line-s" id="line_14"> </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_14">That you'll find me, and that you'll see me</span>
<span class="line line-s" id="line_15"> </span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span itemscope="" itemtype="http://schema.org/Lyric"><span class="line line-s" id="line_15">And that you run and never tire</span>
<br /><span class="line line-s" id="line_16">Desire, desire</span>
<span class="line line-s" id="line_17">Desire, desire</span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-26128185799350581732012-12-31T16:22:00.001+08:002013-02-23T22:14:12.215+08:00Pushing 50: Erasing shadows, burying yesterday's ghosts...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: small;"><i>New Year’s resolutions are those special little promises you make to be
less like yourself and more like other, better people ~ </i>www.newyorker.com</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">A New Year's Resolution?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Um-Uh! No way<i> Jose</i>!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i>Na-da</i>!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Sure, New Year’s resolutions are good. It’s a brand new year;
a shiny new beginning. What better time for me to set new personal goals, shake
off old bad habits and start getting on the good ones. Lose weight. Exercise more.
Stop smoking. Eat healthy. Sleep ONLY 8 hours every night. Save money. Spend
less on chocolates. Avoid <s>p0rns</s> chocolates. Exercise more. <s>Tolerate</s>
cut off idiots out of my life. Better time management. Don’t be lazy. Don’t
procrastinate. Better <s>time</s> anger management. Stop repeating myself again
and again. What else? Try to get married/divorce ONLY once in a year. Recycle,
reuse, and reduce. *<i>la-di-da</i>* </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">The goody-two-shoes side of me is saying that a New Year’s
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year-end I deserve a pat on a shoulder. Mission accomplished, job well-done and
all is good. However, the devilish-up-to-no-good side of me said: Baloney! It’s
just a crappy tradition. Everyone is doing it. Any Tom, Dick and Harry must have
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you said it… a faux pas. </span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Anyway, what’s the point of having a theoretically correct
set of resolution at the beginning of the year when I cocksure know *<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">talking through years of experience, of
course!</i>* I will only going to break each and one of those
‘perfectly-rational-thing-to-do’ things in the list come March. *<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’d be lucky if I could get that far!</i>* That
doesn’t mean I’m not motivated to make any improvement in my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m pretty much aware of my little bad habits
and misdemeanour that are hazardous to the mind, body and soul. And I’m
rational enough to know that these detrimental wrongdoings need to be
terminated or they will terminate my physical or mental being soon enough.*<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">whichever one comes first</i>* But talking
about will-power, *<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">sigh</i>* that my dear
friend is what lacking in my faculty. *<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I’m
hopeless. I KNOW</i>*</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">On a more serious note, I honestly think any time is a good
time to start on something good. I don’t really need a long whole year to gauge
what’s good and what’s bad for my very own wellbeing to finally be sensible
enough to make some changes, do I? *<i>Errk!
think again?*</i> . If I recognize a bad thing, I will definitely realize it
there and then. Spot on! And it’s up to me the take appropriate steps to change
it for the better. *<i>One word: conscience.
Remember?*</i> On the other hand if I
don’t see anything bad going, *<i>against my
better judgement and so called denial, perhaps?</i>* chances are I will never
do anything about it. Be it 5 days, 5 weeks or even 5 years nothing will ever change<span style="font-size: large;">.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Naturally, being responsible adults, *<i>yeah, right!*</i> when we eventually realize that we are not doing
things right or something is just NOT right for us anymore; we will take
immediate action to rectify the situation. We don’t have to wait for the year
to end to get things done. It will then be too late…too much damage has been done.
Change will be painful by then. You know the drill too well, ‘Bad habits die
hard.’ Needless to say, if you need to adjust to some changes for your own
good, then start doing it NOW. Yeah I know, it’s easier said than done. Probably
by knowing your priorities, realizing the imperious DO OR DIE factors may help
you kick off the annoying bad habits and start getting some kickass good behaviour
into your life. A change for the better, however difficult it may be, at the
end of the day, *at the end-of the year?* is always good. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Here’s wishing you good people a Happy New Year! This year,
may we all find eternal peace and happiness…and LOVE. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">*<i>hope is good*winkwink</i>*</span></div>
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<![endif]--><span style="font-size: large;">Awesome Me,<i><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> </span></i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">SueSenahAnderson</span></i>.</span></div>
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<i>P.S</i><br />
<i>The title to this entry is taken from a friend's tweet @Twitter. </i><br />
<i>Thanks UncleBennyHill and a happy New Year to you!</i></div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-11781189070894139962012-12-30T04:13:00.003+08:002012-12-30T12:27:54.540+08:00Pushing 50: Let there be light<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeh1cJ3US-UwQevgkVU1IFzg267TU5DxVxbK11py9JJ8Vae8WUo1LY3HsxnQX-Ka6Edbm4rsSp0MC4mqyUuMps1mtIC81EsWHakAMLG5Oda6lvsRranpPlJv2O6Emi502yfYOlZJ7TJf3B/s1600/goodbye.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeh1cJ3US-UwQevgkVU1IFzg267TU5DxVxbK11py9JJ8Vae8WUo1LY3HsxnQX-Ka6Edbm4rsSp0MC4mqyUuMps1mtIC81EsWHakAMLG5Oda6lvsRranpPlJv2O6Emi502yfYOlZJ7TJf3B/s640/goodbye.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-MY;">I tried to come up with a meaningful write-up for
the year- end, something significant to bid 2012 goodbye. There are so many things
to mention, too many sweet notable moments and not forgetting of course, the hurtful
ones. But words…aaah too many of them and because there are too many of them at
my disposal, they failed me. Eh? <i>*someone told me once, “If you can’t convince
them, confuse them.” So, how am I doing so far?*</i> The thing is, I simply couldn’t
arrange my thoughts neatly <i>*if not cleverly*</i> into one insightful but passionate,
contained and justified review. Instead it fizzled into an unrestrained babble
with too many unnecessary digressions and irrelevant issues. Either I’m too
emotional or compartmentalization is not or perhaps never, my faculty. Or
perhaps writing is never my faculty to begin with! <i>*snort*</i> Anyway, 2012 is just
around the corner, and I need to come up with an ‘obituary-sort-of’ <i>*NOT a
biography!*</i> and end the year with a bang! Well... fat hope!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-MY;">But all is not lost. I found this beautifully written
article and essentially it matches my thoughts. I guess Mr. Coelho must have
read my SOS / Massage-In-The-Bottle pathetic plight that I wrote during my torturous,
darkest and blackest hours a few weeks back and that had inspired him to write
this profound piece. <i>*hey, I am allowed to imagine, okay?*</i> Bottom line is, Mr.
Coelho’s write-up made me feel good. It provided me with repose and comfort I badly
needed. We all knew that these two buggers have gone diving head-first towards
zero level in my R&D Mental Department for the past few months. At the
speed they were going, I almost believed they weren’t coming back up at all.
But they are back on track now and the developmental graph is looking good. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m not totally out of the woods yet but I’m
certainly ready to face another year. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-MY;">Yeah Mr. Big Guy 2013…bring it on!</span></div>
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</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; mso-outline-level: 2;">
<b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-MY;"><a href="http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2012/12/28/closing-cycles/" title="Permanent link to 2012: closing cycles"><span style="color: blue;">2012:
closing cycles</span></a></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-MY;">by Paulo
Coelho on December 28, 2012</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">One always has to know when a stage comes to an end. If we
insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the
meaning of the other stages we have to go through.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters – whatever
name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that
have finished.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship come to an
end? Did you leave your parents’ house? Gone to live abroad? Has a long-lasting
friendship ended all of a sudden?</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">You can tell yourself you won’t take another step until you
find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life
have turned into dust, just like that.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">But such an attitude will be awfully stressing for everyone
involved: your parents, your husband or wife, your friends, your children, your
sister.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Everyone is finishing chapters, turning over new leaves,
getting on with life, and they will all feel bad seeing you at a standstill.</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go
away.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-MY;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span> Please read more:
</span><a href="http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2012/12/28/closing-cycles/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2012/12/28/closing-cycles/</a><br />
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-MY;"></span><br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-16270056783385956272012-12-27T15:01:00.000+08:002012-12-27T15:01:19.458+08:00Pushing 50: Roots<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got. <br />
Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot. <br />
Wouldn't you like to get away? <br />
Sometimes you want to go <br />
Where everybody knows your name, <br />
and they're always glad you came. <br />
You wanna be where you can see,<br />
our troubles are all the same<br />
You wanna be where everybody knows</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Your name. <br />
You wanna go where people know, <br />
people are all the same, <br />
You wanna go where everybody knows<br />
your name.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxFiIydLbunAb91f41XqO_9tk_CEytFuioNP1BId9WK-SOBkAdtPwGGMPFDXxPUJb2KpC4uhQbCiyb9uTxriA' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">“there are two types of people in the world: </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">those who prefer to be sad among others, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">and those who prefer to be sad alone.”
</span><br /> ―
<a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2633.Nicole_Krauss">Nicole Krauss</a>,
<i>
<a href="http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/1882970">The History of Love</a>
</i><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVWmDUgyjsQZqauIXedLK5frITjUjwsToo5PI33aIBlWM5R6Fs0IKm1H0lW649gUfbfCXttynsUndN77TsLYIMXKsMMvFMByQ9oOQf2N2UWcBDy2-ZX9Wv2Be5e2vYmZ075ODHGuktcimn/s1600/merry+christmas1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVWmDUgyjsQZqauIXedLK5frITjUjwsToo5PI33aIBlWM5R6Fs0IKm1H0lW649gUfbfCXttynsUndN77TsLYIMXKsMMvFMByQ9oOQf2N2UWcBDy2-ZX9Wv2Be5e2vYmZ075ODHGuktcimn/s400/merry+christmas1.jpg" width="302" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"> Happy New Yea<span style="font-size: large;">r!</span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-51812032468738838272012-12-26T18:43:00.001+08:002012-12-26T18:43:54.819+08:00Pushing 50: Love is all that matters<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmYsfnMQNPwrlyJARTu_OVt1ab4O9buuzzhnI5VPEXTwTzFP0cxaBYnpg-PGuugf-94HECrGAqly_NtpqkTiTgNjw1BXXrhh2pBqT9VBogxDSQ-6spKfkCROFhP8XzO5tww21DamDjZA3Z/s1600/46435_10151162247351434_35099286_na.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmYsfnMQNPwrlyJARTu_OVt1ab4O9buuzzhnI5VPEXTwTzFP0cxaBYnpg-PGuugf-94HECrGAqly_NtpqkTiTgNjw1BXXrhh2pBqT9VBogxDSQ-6spKfkCROFhP8XzO5tww21DamDjZA3Z/s1600/46435_10151162247351434_35099286_na.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">“you can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-39488514000890455062012-12-26T17:43:00.001+08:002012-12-26T17:43:51.254+08:00Pushing 50: Family Ties<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">It was a short trip. No Stadthuys. No Porta de Santiago.
No Jonker Street or Morten Village. And sadly enough no trishaw rides! For
someone who hadn’t set foot in Malacca for the past 17 years, not being able to
visit those places is as bad as having an orgasm<span style="font-size: large;">-</span>less sex. *especially when you
didn’t get to ride the trishaw!* However, the sleep over at the resort was fun.
A lot of fun for the kids who soaked themselves in the pool until they were
wrinkled prunes. And just for the fun of it, we the adults also soaked ourselves
in the pool but not fun enough to stay in a while longer to become wrinkled
prunes. Yup, adults are no fun! </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">That night when everyone else was deep asleep, my brother
and I stayed up and talked. Or I ranted, for that matter. *yeah, talking about pent-up
emotions* We rambled far into the night over endless cups of hot Nescafe and
lighting <span> </span>ciggie after another and roasting
our lungs to hell. I truly needed the brainwashing *brainbashing* and so called
the ‘food for soul’ lecture. Who else is fit enough to do the job other than
him? At 46 I still need my big brother to shake out all the nonsense off me.
Imagine that! </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">It was almost morning when I finally threw in the towel.
I mumbled goodnight and left him toying with his cameras. **He told me that lately
cameras can easily turn him on compared to women. Even Sarimah Ibrahim fails, well…unless
she’s holding a camera, that is! Ha ha! SO not funny** In the stillness of the early
morning as I made my way to the bedroom,<span>
</span>I smiled to the rhythmic snoring from the rooms nearby. That, I told
myself is the sound of HOME. A familiar song only my heart knows so well. </span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Family gatherings give me that warm fuzzy feeling all the
time. It was indeed a good trip.</span><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">A trishaw ride? Well, there will always be a next time.</span>
</div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-87721328371403780332012-12-24T17:16:00.002+08:002012-12-24T17:16:47.751+08:00Pushing 50: The Final Countdown<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuI2LlUsrVznUBFMwg9eS8BdFYHftlySdA5taEX0aaH5vJzpYYBUel-zqwS8GBNi8iRLcuHf384-sgA8Nyhk47qE0dsaOZZWqbhZ1GQTxC0zRCzyja2j4FbQ7mWdLY7AMg4psa6prlqA6h/s1600/happy+new+me.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="454" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuI2LlUsrVznUBFMwg9eS8BdFYHftlySdA5taEX0aaH5vJzpYYBUel-zqwS8GBNi8iRLcuHf384-sgA8Nyhk47qE0dsaOZZWqbhZ1GQTxC0zRCzyja2j4FbQ7mWdLY7AMg4psa6prlqA6h/s640/happy+new+me.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;">Goodbye Venus.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: x-large;">You will be missed tremendously.</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-54814521592462998892012-12-14T15:24:00.002+08:002012-12-14T15:24:27.761+08:00Pushing 50: A Walk To Remember<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoEIhNumDGEyLavadJ2Mcj3c48NPWaAstF4ad6l1mkhTsFgPpaSozgptBHKYhlozEWaIpZdK6c4SHCiWaWvGMl60_IzAtmCAOJ4DeRRfs9TA7H5WuNxOMd67x_jwy3ZWIjQm1bO2n_A-1P/s1600/Syabil+Bird+park.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoEIhNumDGEyLavadJ2Mcj3c48NPWaAstF4ad6l1mkhTsFgPpaSozgptBHKYhlozEWaIpZdK6c4SHCiWaWvGMl60_IzAtmCAOJ4DeRRfs9TA7H5WuNxOMd67x_jwy3ZWIjQm1bO2n_A-1P/s640/Syabil+Bird+park.jpg" width="640" /> </a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">The Bird Park?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Hah! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">When I heard the word, the first thing that hit me was the
thought of being under the sun. Exactly! The blazing, hot sun! And the sweat
and the prickly scalp underneath the head scarf, the blotchy make up and the wet
armpits. I have no issues with birds. I love bird-watching. It’s the sun that
depresses me. Have it my way, I’ll opt for National Geographic anytime! However,
in contradictory to my anxiety of being under the sun, I agreed to go. Anyway,
it was Syabil’s 4<sup>th</sup> birthday and I had missed 3 of his birthday
parties consecutively. So I went. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Much to my pleasure, it was not as bad as I had anticipated
it. It was fun. Rated 4 ½ star. The birds are majestically stunning. The bird
show was fairly entertaining and if you managed to properly listen to what the
trainer had to say, it was indeed educational. *the trainer’s English
enunciation was appalling but hey…not just about anyone can teach a bird Arithmetic,
right? Kudos to Mr. Bird Trainer!* The long walk from point A to point B and
then to Point C and to another point and another one after that, surprisingly
didn’t dampen my spirit. Even the itchy armpit and the blotched eye makeup
didn’t bother me at all. The sun? What can I say… All in all it was a joyful
outing of which I had to admit, I badly needed. I’ve been cooped-up in the
house for much too long I honestly thought I would melt under the sun. But I didn’t
and the bird park was simply amazing with its fantastic green landscape with
the trees and plants and birds all playing the same important role in beautifying
the whole area. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span> </span>As I watched those
adorable kids running about giggling, laughing, whining or even bawling I couldn’t
help but felt a pang of envy towards their easy going, hassle-free simple life.
*and it made me thought of my Mia back in Ipoh and how terribly I’m missing her
eye-catching smiles and her small baby voice.* Unlike us, the adults, we are
forever uptight and edgy. We move about daily with our adults’ mind being
constantly nagged by endless unsettled matter. We always have either something
to do or something to cloud our minds with. We pout. We complain. We grumble.
Sadly enough we all lead our own pathetic complicated lives. Most of us, if not
all, have even forgotten how to smile. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Later on that day I escaped to a scheduled balcony to enjoy a
long-overdue-much-needed ciggy. As I watched the sky my eyes caught an eagle flying
through the horizon. It glided swiftly and freely across the big blue sky. I swear
I could hear the wind rustling in my ears and the breeze brushing against my
skin. It was just a SUPER-WOW moment. And that, brought a smile to my face. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Dear Bird Park, I’m glad I came…</span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">
</span><br /><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-6085676494858512902012-12-13T19:08:00.000+08:002012-12-13T19:24:09.419+08:00Pushing 50: My Alter Ego<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Life sucks! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">BIG time<span style="font-size: large;">!</span> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Yup…you read that right. Reality bites and it bites hard, hard,
hard cold bites! And day by day…it’s getting even more difficult to act as a
normal functioning adult. I’m struggling to keep a brave front, to smile when I
actually feel like crying and to stay alive when I wish otherwise. It is the
darkest before dawn so I’ve been told. But hey… let me tell you, this is the
longest darkest hour ever! And from the looks of it, I’m awfully certain this suffocating
darkness will hover and linger for a little while longer over my horizon. It has
set its determined mind and refuses to budge even an inch. No compromise! Gosh,
I hate this monotonous-nothing-happens-depressingly-tormenting phase of my
life. And so you should know, HATE is a BIG word in my dictionary. I normally
avoid using the word but once used it sure did come from within the darkest side of
me. Looks like ‘dark’ <span style="font-size: large;">apparently and appropriately</span> is the theme for the day, isn’t it? This rough patch
I’m going through at the moment is slowly eating up my sanity and if I’m not
careful… <i><b>*you fill in the blank*</b></i> No, I’m not giving up neither am I whining. Okay
fine…so I’m whining but I’m keeping it minimal, okay? Happy now? Let’s just say
that today my negativity is at its prime. <i><b>*Help!*</b></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">And no Sir, you don’t get to psychoanalyze me. I know the
drill. I know I should be more grateful and thankful for what I have and that
others have it even worse. Hunger. War. Oppression. Abuse. Aids. Poverty. <b>*</b><i><b>ouch!</b></i><b>*</b> Cancer. Dementia. Schizophrenia.
Jobless. <i><b>*sounds familiar?*</b></i> OCD. Living
on the streets. <i><b>*gulp!*</b></i> Living with MIL. Living with assholes. <b><i>*please excuse my
French!*</i></b> Having to deal with inconsiderate drivers on daily basis. Having to
face the traffic jam on daily basis. Having to deal with assholes on daily
basis. <i><b>*Bitter is now my middle name *</b></i> And the list goes on and on… </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I know <span style="font-size: large;">m</span>y misery is absolutely miniscule compared to those
above-mentioned. So what if I wake up each morning and the unpaid bills are staring
down on my face and wishing me good morning? So what if I miss wearing my
working clothes and getting a considerably fat pay check at the end of the
month? So what if I haven’t been to the hair dresser for only God knows how
long? So what if I have no idea when the next job will ever come my way? So
what if I know fcuk how to pay off the house rental next month? <b><i>*More examples
are unnecessary. You go figure.*</i></b> Brave is not on my option list at this very
moment. Can I skip this level, please? Or is there a <span style="font-size: large;">'</span>Quit Game<span style="font-size: large;">'</span> button somewhere? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">I seriously ought to get a grip of myself. Yeah, like I have
any other choices! Oh, what the hell Senah…let’s just bite the bullet! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmTQzbLydNmiXRRND4na8hGRH2xlVOSnIxYmxJ0OuwT8y8LEHP6QhnYBydZSZYeHOhAESsV7OjijjQTw8RTuW_5hXP26Vp_VKNm6kTsZhHvSVF2LcaxhxcYTiaV3sIt-Ucgz5LcxKnMCkD/s1600/the+woman.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="406" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmTQzbLydNmiXRRND4na8hGRH2xlVOSnIxYmxJ0OuwT8y8LEHP6QhnYBydZSZYeHOhAESsV7OjijjQTw8RTuW_5hXP26Vp_VKNm6kTsZhHvSVF2LcaxhxcYTiaV3sIt-Ucgz5LcxKnMCkD/s640/the+woman.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-49435374019973557532012-12-12T22:07:00.000+08:002012-12-12T22:07:28.598+08:00Pushing 50: Bittersweet<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdAww_fBmDoyW4oLQpnZMfveGbs_yMG24FJejgVGEqOd4Vx955kRaxl7BGJJUQgXTbPKfs1P0zbi0nuNs9LoaUpjY64SbB5m8UOrD5xb1tHIAGqZlDKLPeg2bIaHG0doLVxIK_F50VVLvg/s1600/Coco+Chanel+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdAww_fBmDoyW4oLQpnZMfveGbs_yMG24FJejgVGEqOd4Vx955kRaxl7BGJJUQgXTbPKfs1P0zbi0nuNs9LoaUpjY64SbB5m8UOrD5xb1tHIAGqZlDKLPeg2bIaHG0doLVxIK_F50VVLvg/s640/Coco+Chanel+2.jpg" width="480" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-67337073989930739852012-12-12T05:10:00.001+08:002012-12-12T05:17:57.684+08:00Pushing 50: Beef Binge!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcPH4fCGerikuH1mACVUlWO6IPxaJizxtOOXoWw6ZKDTd9bBHeEI3IEJfirhqzF_HhqarfSb79-PaROxgFXcMab_l-6ECxV8EfDc99e3-8mfkMsojM2ovN2qUde6WZVdc3QnAlZ1Uj1KMP/s1600/Las+Vacas+2nd+round.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcPH4fCGerikuH1mACVUlWO6IPxaJizxtOOXoWw6ZKDTd9bBHeEI3IEJfirhqzF_HhqarfSb79-PaROxgFXcMab_l-6ECxV8EfDc99e3-8mfkMsojM2ovN2qUde6WZVdc3QnAlZ1Uj1KMP/s1600/Las+Vacas+2nd+round.jpg" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Yes, it's Las Vacas again and no, i am not going to ramble on the delicious, mouth-watering, saliva-drooling food like i did in the earlier posting. Enough. But i do however want to point out that good food plus good company doesn't happen to me everyday. And this is one of those 'Life-Is-Good' moments in my life. Thank you for the 'happy-meal' Che Pah. You're such a sunshine! </span><br />
<br />
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-38228515862052653522012-12-12T02:28:00.000+08:002012-12-12T02:28:30.355+08:00Pushing 50: Games Being Downloaded<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKY1QTCC8LX0uWXFyJ-SxQwcM9-sqVcwPKchdMEHProphZBVxvyUt2ZlE4vGx4WR9jJKrahif_PIi93C682BMfrWOsFQnDjkLDB1aakNFU-ZItBaO6psAY4iDi_EnBD5m9vpfMCUAeTwED/s1600/Game+Over.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="604" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKY1QTCC8LX0uWXFyJ-SxQwcM9-sqVcwPKchdMEHProphZBVxvyUt2ZlE4vGx4WR9jJKrahif_PIi93C682BMfrWOsFQnDjkLDB1aakNFU-ZItBaO6psAY4iDi_EnBD5m9vpfMCUAeTwED/s640/Game+Over.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-17536316313235329432012-12-12T01:08:00.001+08:002012-12-12T04:40:09.828+08:00Pushing 50: Humpty Dumpty<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3gibwJYcKW5A9iMajrKEr3VfdYYpJJCay0s9xW_tzUpgZ8Cw2GqwVHGRl0AtNWO1tJMJjJkliioac_zbU9um2iw5EN65_irqkXb9i7L6F3uBpkNAljI2p5FtFOMRxLlZ5BFvVoobS8qiJ/s1600/My+walls.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="512" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3gibwJYcKW5A9iMajrKEr3VfdYYpJJCay0s9xW_tzUpgZ8Cw2GqwVHGRl0AtNWO1tJMJjJkliioac_zbU9um2iw5EN65_irqkXb9i7L6F3uBpkNAljI2p5FtFOMRxLlZ5BFvVoobS8qiJ/s640/My+walls.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">We all have this ‘come-with-maximum-safety-features-built-in-walls’
surrounding us at some point of time in our lives. Having built these walls, you
have total control to the inventory of people you allow to come into your
little sanctuary. The selected few, if any, will be those who display some sort
of effort to get to know you and finally, win your affection. In short, this invisible
defence mechanism is to keep you at bay from getting hurt, harm and other life-threatening
innuendos, so to speak.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Okay, so we have erected these sturdy insulated walls around
us and therefore life should be all sugar and spice, right? Ermm…think again? The
walls you built also means a barrier to the outside world. Surrounded for some
amount of time by these walls, being isolated from almost everyone and everything,
it can get mighty lonely at times and to some extreme levels, you can also get
yourself lost in there. While it is okay to be safe and sound in your little
shell and to hang on and wait for anyone who would care enough to knock down
your walls, it is also good to be optimistic about life. Take a chance on
others. Not all is out there to hurt you. Some may even surprise you with their
kindness, compassion and of course, love. And if along the way, some may hurt
you, so what’s the big deal? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">No pain, no gain so the saying goes</span>. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-76610719164039201262012-12-06T13:14:00.003+08:002012-12-06T13:14:56.185+08:00Pushing 50: A little bird told me.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEir8WoGHXj1Hlt3XvN4y1ccUkS2VfpMNc7s6AnaWqCj1VavmPk2n8MyVYVPcUlFeq4zA3Mpr7naU7D7rFniCZsXcr_72GtlCYwYmCuaa7Q1YVKguoU5L-vPGdscUoyBlXdMfXkQnfZ7IuPu/s1600/Give+Love.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEir8WoGHXj1Hlt3XvN4y1ccUkS2VfpMNc7s6AnaWqCj1VavmPk2n8MyVYVPcUlFeq4zA3Mpr7naU7D7rFniCZsXcr_72GtlCYwYmCuaa7Q1YVKguoU5L-vPGdscUoyBlXdMfXkQnfZ7IuPu/s640/Give+Love.jpg" width="476" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">The more we give, the more we receive.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Give good. </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Give your best.</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2459242663057695927.post-63245077095631280602012-12-06T07:21:00.000+08:002012-12-06T07:21:18.296+08:00Pushing 50: Love is YOU.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpeKIlOwZuRbiF2WbtEyHna7oFkDHkDjwQ2t97GN0kDhTUaHwGk2eB6jLnJ3pRJP-K7ccSDRveUROYPJCzg7T6Yy7RiHwRe2IJy3_gqcdw4LO4JnO8wUWtVUUFUm7rn6e2VyGmBU7lozgK/s1600/LOVE-IS.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghNAzKpgf8vfvP0oBvDyPfNId8nNimP9ndxkb8kvbxlpTFvx-3pmSQV38aapZihuFaogujghH88ocQAgoo3h4hWhK6QxR_Xdbk31OHv40UtjU4x8LTihOb89wXIaxduccB-CA3UzQBeIj1/s1600/love_is_bounce.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA99BbowwJSVJSVAwL1Svt_ZaRMpZe1WhYfaN0g9tvICuj1fbhvTeZHLYok3sN2E5EXN5rk6T_vPkHgQzG_rb4AGeCO5sOhhcOlVsiwhYeHd5d0H7Im7phNyRAATdVYg8kQose2eLBW2Vs/s1600/Love+is+YOU.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="590" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA99BbowwJSVJSVAwL1Svt_ZaRMpZe1WhYfaN0g9tvICuj1fbhvTeZHLYok3sN2E5EXN5rk6T_vPkHgQzG_rb4AGeCO5sOhhcOlVsiwhYeHd5d0H7Im7phNyRAATdVYg8kQose2eLBW2Vs/s640/Love+is+YOU.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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</div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">It is important to find the right person to be with but do bear in mind that it is also important to become the right person for the one you love. There are always t<span style="font-size: large;">wo</span> sides to every coin. If the person you love is able to cater to your needs, make you smile and breathe new life into your soul and make your eyes <span style="font-size: large;">spar<span style="font-size: large;">kle</span></span> with happiness, it's only fair for you to reciprocate. You can't just sit there on your <span style="font-size: large;">nice ass and expect to be showered with <span style="font-size: large;">unconditional love endlessly without you putting any effort to make th<span style="font-size: large;">at person feels just as good<span style="font-size: large;">. Love <span style="font-size: large;">doesnt <span style="font-size: large;">work that way. <span style="font-size: large;">In order to survive <span style="font-size: large;">and grow, </span>i</span>t needs a lot of tender loving care f<span style="font-size: large;">rom both parties<span style="font-size: large;">. Be <span style="font-size: large;">fair. <span style="font-size: large;">B</span>e considerate. Choose to <span style="font-size: large;">b</span>e<span style="font-size: large;"> more giving rather than <span style="font-size: large;">to be at the receiving end most times. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Love r<span style="font-size: large;">equires <span style="font-size: large;">tremendous hard work but <span style="font-size: large;">at the end of the day, the reward is worth <span style="font-size: large;">your while</span>. Anyway, what wouldn't you do just to see <span style="font-size: large;">a s<span style="font-size: large;">mile that lights up your lover's face<span style="font-size: large;">?</span> Especially when you know you are certain<span style="font-size: large;">ly <span style="font-size: large;">responsible for that <span style="font-size: large;">one sweet </span>smile<span style="font-size: large;">.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Be kind. Be Love. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsCZGmZNy52MaIeBtTzij8QtmKtK-fGJZZrORO00UH4aG_9eXNiLfaN4cVTLdfUB_2svEu82v9McUZ96jOE5Q0u4xqXonvcIRqJjWVIeFADfG6Ng-hfchoUEz7EgySDxAL_wBPxYI-hn2o/s1600/Love+is.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsCZGmZNy52MaIeBtTzij8QtmKtK-fGJZZrORO00UH4aG_9eXNiLfaN4cVTLdfUB_2svEu82v9McUZ96jOE5Q0u4xqXonvcIRqJjWVIeFADfG6Ng-hfchoUEz7EgySDxAL_wBPxYI-hn2o/s640/Love+is.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10101431047413985130noreply@blogger.com0